We return to the MTS Centre and head to the broadcast position.  Looking at the back of Cedar and Miles’ heads, the viewing audience is presented with a good view of the squared circle, ready to receive it’s next set of combatants.

What a great match between Drake Dysfunction & EG Deal Joey.

Helluva a show Teddy, and I’m not above saying there were a few surprises.

Before our next contest heads into the ring, let’s go to some pre-recorded comments from the Logging Crew.

Jesus….

We leave the safety of Manitoba and pass eastward, through the Canadian Shield, through the hamlets and villages of rural Quebec, passed the assorted train derailments of northern New Brunswick and into the heart of Miramichi timber country.  The unblinking eye of the camcorder leers at the front door of a log cabin, leaning and coated with moss.  The audiovisual equipment faintly picks up the dull smack of an axe crashing through a block of firewood.  Following the noise, the viewer is taken around the camp, briefly looking into windows, but finding only a distorted reflection and an inky blackness within.  Finally, arriving at the dingle, we find the massive form of Cletus in mid-swing.  The crash of his double-bitted axe is followed by a snapping of wood, too weak to resist.

The tag team champions let their eyes wander to Cyberslam and look what happened…ol’Dave Michaels is seeing things a little differently, if he’s seeing at all.

Big Jim emerges from within the dingle, his arms stained with blood.

They thought nothing could hurt them...thought they was tougher than a boiled owl…but we left 'em crying and bleeding… like a couple of virgins…

But we are now the number 1 contenders, so as much fun as we had before, some things are worth doing twice.  And if you decide to bring Nova along…

Well, she’s just the pussy we been lookin’ for…

Jim flits his tongue in an out

Now, as far as this week goes, I’d say the Jack of Hearts is gonna look like an old maid after Jimmy’s through with him.

You’re got yerself all fancied up. You have a date, or what? 

Was she pretty, or did you have to get a few in first? 

Is she out here tonight, or is she watchin’ in the back? 

Has she got your love stink on her, or are you waitin’ until later? 

Are you hopin’ that seein’ you kickin’ the tar outta me, she’s gonna be slipperier than deer guts on a glass doorknob? Well, I do hope tusslin’ with her is better than what I got in store for you tonight, but I doubt it’ll get that far. 

See, I reckon you’d have best done the deed already, cause if you ain’t wetted your end yet, yer gonna be the sorriest lay that poor girl is likely to have. You’ll lie there and moan, like usual, but it won’t be on account of the grip she’s got on ya. 

Don’t worry though, how be I make sure and stick ya with the hook?  Leastways then you might get a bit of tetanus, lock you up real stiff…

Jim holds up the pulp hook, all the while rhythmically thrusting his pelvis.

Yessir, they may call you the Joker, but you ain’t gonna be laughin’ after tonight.  Of course, you will have a story to tell when folks ask how you got those scars.

You got all the titles between ya boys, like Verne Gagne on the juice, but that suits us.  

'Cause ya see, in two matches, our first two tag team matches in XWA, we beat every champion there is this entire company.


So, you better evolve quick boys...


It's survival of the fittest and you look like you couldn't knock a sick whore off a shit-pot.


Cyberslam's comin', we'll be watchin', good luck...


Cletus resumes his chopping while Big Jim retreats into the dingle once more.  Cletus sings