Rellim Strife vs. John Hudson
Grader: Myke

Misery (Rellim Strife)
Word Count: 223

It literally was a “he did this”, “he did that” match post. But thanks for posting something. I enjoyed Rellim getting on the mic. Not much else I can say about your match…

Joe Cool (John Hudson)
Word Count: 553

You had more of a story. More description. And just better action overall.

Verdict

I’m glad both of you showed. I’m somewhat disappointed it wasn’t more though. Even I managed to BS a post in 30 minutes and managed to get 1,000 words. Neither posts were that good (sorry guys, but it’s the truth because there was a lack of anything special). Both could have used some commentary to give it a better feel and flow. I will admit: I liked how Misery’s post ended more than Joe Cool’s. But John Hudson gets my vote. It was simply better overall.

Axel Anvil vs. Whisper

Axel wins by no-show.

EG Deal vs Sean Young

E.G. Deal wins by no-show.

Dante Cross vs Shade
Grader: JHalc

Dante Cross: I would like to start off your grade by saying that I can't stand you, and therefore I am going to be biased against you. Before even reading your match, it is my contention that you will lose. Not because of the effort, but because I don't like you. You move too fast between moves sir. I guess what I am saying is that there is little selling or emotion in there, it is just a step by step breakdown, almost like I am reading a play by play instead of an actual match. You have a lot of action though. Despite your match being short, a lot of things are going on.

WHY IS MY NAME IN THE MIDDLE OF YOUR MATCH?!?!?!?!?
"“That was a unique move by one Josh Halcomb!” Sandy Ravage said, “Wow, this guy is good!”"

Wait.... I am pretty sure this is a blatant rip off of a match. The finish is a counter of my finisher into a table.



Shade: Breaking the fourth wall with the announce team? I can enjoy that. The early going seemed a little odd to me. Attacking the referee seems illogical, but then again, I am pretty sure that was your point. Short, brutal and to the point though. You did well using a weapon to counter the fact that this was a quick and rushed effort. Each man got their shots in quick, Dante descent through the table was a pretty solid spot to finish. I like the double foot stomp move. Short. Rushed. Decent. Fair job for the amount of effort you put in.

Verdict: Yea... Winner via DQ -- Shade

ADDED FROM MYKE: Dante

Your first paragraph was fine. Except Shade wouldn’t care if he’s disliked more than his opponent or not. Do you even read gimmicks? Seriously. They are there for a point. It lets people know more about the wrestler. This is now the second time you have misused Shade. And I fail to see how a bipolar pyromaniac who is currently channeling his younger brother and long-time friend (thought to also be a brother) means that Shade “has no character”. He has more character than your wrestler since your character is simply an arrogant douchebag; it’s been said and done. Numerous times.

Shade also has a massive fucking move list. Do you see “Hurricanrana” anywhere in it? No. You don’t. Shade doesn’t do that sort of thing. You’re also making Shade this speedy wrestler, and he is not.

Also, your post is “I’MA HAVE ____ DO THIS! AND THEN I’MA HAVE ____ DO THAT!” No emotion whatsoever. Guess what: portraying emotions/feelings is part of being a good writer.

I stopped reading at the line where Shade yells to the fans helping him up.

Complete misuse of my character. It’s beyond pathetic. He probably didn’t even crack open Shade’s profile to look at statistics, height, weight, or anything. Whether this post was copied or not doesn’t matter – the post was bad. A good writer Dante is not.

Drake Dysfunction vs Kanimaniac

Drake wins by no-show.

Mack vs Xtreme Icon

Double no-show.

David Michaels vs AJ Miller

David wins by no-show.

Razor Xtreme vs. Tyler Lawson
Grader: Caleb Spires

Grading this as I go along and not going to edit it. So I might say something wrong and then correct myself later through it. Let's get this shit started.

Tyler Lawson - Starting off, I liked the sneak attack by Razor before the bell rang. Set a good tone for how Razor is an asshole and wanting payback from the segment the previous week. I also like the opening action of the match. The way it was written at first made me think “oh, cliché ducking and leapfrogs followed by an arm drag or something.” But then the backdrop over the top rope, followed by counters from Razor was a nice shake up. As I can tell throughout the first paragraph, your flow is pretty much spot on. Everything is going nicely so far.

I wasn’t a huge fan of the line “Seems he’s taking a page out of Lawson’s book and targeting a body part. Interesting.” That’s not really a patent for Lawson. That is actually very common. But I’ll try not to be too much of a stickler and that really won’t affect whether you win or lose. Just something I felt the need to whine about. Funny

As I continue, you’re doing very well with description and, again, flow. The selling is going pretty well also, which kinda goes along with description. Oops, take that back. You had Razor get Alabama Slammed and immediately roll back up to his feet. I understand it may not be a big move for Lawson, but it is still a finisher for someone else and he had absolutely no problem getting to his feet. Aside from that, selling has still been going pretty well.

Holy hell. That lead pipe shot straight to the skull came a little earlier than I was expecting. Perhaps should have held that off a little bit later as taking a lead pipe to the skull is generally, in one of the best ways to put this, one of the most fucking painful things you could experience. Nevertheless, the outside ring action/hardcore stipulation was used pretty well, I just think the lead pipe straight to the skull should have been used at a different time.

The action goes back into the ring, and I’m still liking the description and selling in this one. Not to mention, it’s not pointless description that makes me want to smack my head into my laptop. It’s actually pulling me into the match and helping me visual it a lot better, which is a good thing for a writer to do. Kudos on that. No need to analyze every single paragraph to tell you the same thing. Your flow, description, and selling was all done well.

The pipe shot to the face toward the end I think was a much more fitting place to put it and the aftereffects of Razor talking shit and the “busted open” comment sold the shot as one of the big parts of the match, which it was. Your ending was pretty average. Nothing really spectacular, but not a random, unfitting finish. Except for the description of Lawson crawling over to get the cover. That was pretty nice actually. It sold the effects of the match and summed up the importance of the win for Lawson. The after-three kickout from Razor was also a nice little addition.

All in all, I would have never guessed that was only your 3rd match back from a long hiatus. There were a few parts that I didn’t really care for, but overall it was a strong post. You had a nice flow, good descriptions, and good selling most of the time. You also utilized the no disqualification stipulation solidly. Haven’t read Razor’s match yet, but it should be a good one.

Razor Xtreme – Right off the bat, I noticed somewhat of a cheap shot at Tyler, saying he hasn’t been successful. Harsh man, he’s an RSD champion and an International champion to his right. I figure it wasn’t meant that way, but kind of funny. Funny

A few things I picked out in the first paragraph; Could have used a bit more description on the effects of the moves. Take the hammerlock for example; You just had Lawson immediately spin to the back of Razor and reverse it. You could have expanded it, explaining something like “a sharp pain is sent up Lawson’s arm, causing him to cringe as he looks around to try and find a way out.” Doesn’t have to be exactly like that, but sending a message that the hammerlock affected Lawson would have been better. I also liked how you made a reference to Rellim and Eric Bull, which I am now starting to wonder why TJ didn’t mention them at all in his match. I mean, it’s a no DQ match and they would just stand in the back watching their partner lose? OK, don’t want to get too off topic here.

I notice that you also have a pretty nice flow working here. The moves string together and do with a good pace for the match. Holy shit, yet again the lead pipes straight to the face toward the beginning of the match. Maybe this is more of a common thing than I realized. Funny But I liked the way you led up to the lead pipes, having Lawson lose his focus for a second and it costing him. Good heel tag team antics right there.

Another thing I like is that your description has definitely gotten better as the match progresses, and yet you are still maintaining a fast pace. That can be pretty hard to pull off sometimes, and you are pulling it off. You are also doing very well with selling the attacks. You described Lawson’s pain in good detail after Razor was incapacitated. Nice way to keep up the continuity of the selling there.

Nice string of counters with the suplexes, springboard crossbody, ending in a powerslam. Added some nice entertainment to it. There was something about Lawson wailing on Razor with a Singapore cane that made me happy, and I don’t know what it was about it. Regardless, it was a nice payback from the onslaught with the pipe earlier. As I was reading the opening paragraphs, I thought you were burying Lawson, but as it goes on you are developing him as a good star that can hold his own against one of the top in the company.

And by the way, I used the word comeuppance in my last promo. Fuck you Dennis. Mad as hell

The Xtremeasult onto the chair was a pretty cool spot I thought. And I liked that you had Razor affected by the move before getting the cover, good way to show realism with that. Simultaneous big boot was also a good spot.

As pointed out earlier, the usage of Rellim is good and you have done well in building up Lawson. This is illustrated excellently when you had Lawson lock in the sharpshooter only for Rellim to instantly interfere. It helps Lawson look strong even if he loses because then it shows that if not for Rellim, he would have been good enough to beat Razor on his own. Jerod Barnez was also a nice little addition, though he just kind of disappeared and his part was REALLY short. I wasn’t a huge fan of the way he was used, but it was nice that you incorporated your feud into it as an attempt to build more animosity and build-up for your KoX match. And just like Lawson, your finish was pretty average. Not spectacular, but still done pretty well.

All in all, another good one. Used the stipulation well, sold stuff pretty well for the most part, described the match, had a nice flow, and built Lawson up as a legitimate star as it went on. Not your best match ever, but not bad by any means.

VERDICT: Ughh… I really don’t want to pick a winner in this one as it was a good showing by both. I give Lawson the advantage in description and selling(barely). I give Razor the advantage in character portrayal, slightly more entertaining, and the no disqualification stip(barely). Both of you had good flows as well, but I would probably BARELY give the flow to Razor because he started off technical and turned it into a brawl, whereas Lawson had some bigger moves come before a few filler moves. Again, really tough to pick a winner here, but I am going to slip this one to Razor Xtreme for the main reason that he built up outside interactions. Razor is in a team and in a feud with Barnez and TJ didn’t use either of those factors at all. Teej, nice effort. I went back and forth between who I was picking and almost gave this one to you.

Sorry if I seemed like an overcritical douche at times, just trying to give some constructive criticism. And holy shit, I can’t believe my grade is this long. I need to do more with my life.

Hitman Alex vs. Takumi Sanu
Grader: Razor Xtreme

Hitman Alex vs Takumi Sanu

Hitman Alex: I won’t grade based off spelling/grammar, etc. But I have to say that it’s really annoying when I have to read things over several times before I understand what is happening haha… nonetheless, I don’t grade off that, just giving you a tip. Right off the bat, good typical wrestling with the smaller man avoiding the lock up, waist lock, etc. Your description has been relatively nice so far, there’s always room for improvement, but this is still good. There were some parts that needed a bit of work, like “he strikes him with some MMA kicks”, dawg, there are tons of MMA kicks haha. I like your spots right off the bat, the things like the handstand back elbow, and etc. Great description on your submission. I know it's small, but I love things like Alex screaming “get him off me”, it just gives out a good amount of character in the match. I liked the headlock backbreaker reverse thing. Also like the stomps, very Orton-like. Good, solid wrestling with the throwing-leg-into-pole thing. Also neat Gamengiri counter, always picture that happening but I don’t see it often. Dominik being out there was a bit random. I mean, I can see the hype, but seeing as he’s suspended it wouldn’t make much sense, but that’s more to do with Snoopz’ match if anything. Although reading more into it, I did love the way you used him haha. Good character use, once again. Reminds me of Tuco from Breaking Bad. I give you mad props for your submissions. I love the way you describe them. Neat spot on the misses Asai Moonsault to the outside. Not a huge fan of having Dominik interfere to HELP his mortal enemy even though Alex may have hit him. Although the whole, “Takumi knees Dominik, HKO” spot was neat. I kinda wish you had ended it there though, but it’s fine. I did however love your ending. Dante and Kriss interfering was a great touch. So not bad there either.

Takumi Sanu: Like your match right off the bat, simple leg work, good psychology. Your description is definitely getting better. Good selling right off the bat as well, with the whole “spinning heel kick also hurts his knee” thing. A few parts felt a tad bit rushed, like when you didn’t really count the match out, it was more like “He gets to a count of 3. He sits there. The ref gets to a count of nine and he slides in.” Try to work on that a bit. I lol’d at “Get to the damn ropes Puta!” like I said, I love heel Dominik. Your ending was neat and interesting, but honestly it seemed largely rushed. It’s good and all, just try to work on your transitions a bit. Don’t write something that would take a minute in two sentences, it just makes it look bad. Nonetheless, it was creative and I commend you for it. Your entertainment rivaled iLike’s and your selling was great up until the end.

Verdict: This is a very tough one. You both wrote fairly good matches except both of you had a LOT of faults. I pointed out your faults in your posts, I hope you both read them and improve. Snoopz, you had a great match with great selling but your ending felt VERY rushed. Like, VERY VERY rushed. I know you didn’t because you sent it to me in advance, but try to transition a bit better. iLike, you did great as well, except you had some messed up spots too. Nonetheless, after reading both of yours carefully, I have to say that Takumi Sanu had a bit better match overall. I almost gave it to Hitman simply because it felt insanely rushed at the end, but overall, I felt Takumi’s had better story-telling and psychology. Alex’s was better entertainment-wise with a lot better spots, but there was just too much lacking. Both of you have a fair amount of work to do, but I commend you both nonetheless. Takumi literally won it by just a smidge, so don’t feel bad at all iLike, although I know from experience that losing sucks. Just shake it off and bring your A game at King of Xtreme.