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 Dave Demento "Lard Ass"

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Eeyen
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PostSubject: Dave Demento "Lard Ass"   Dave Demento "Lard Ass" EmptySun Aug 04, 2013 11:22 pm

Dave Demento "Lard Ass" DaveDementoLardAss_zps81602d39
DUE: Saturday, August 10th at 11:59 PM EDT (UTC -4 Hours)



Last edited by Ian on Sat Aug 10, 2013 12:50 am; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: Dave Demento "Lard Ass"   Dave Demento "Lard Ass" EmptyThu Aug 08, 2013 4:15 pm

A winded Dave Demento slowly walks over to the side of the ring and request a bottle of water from a stagehand. The XWA employee obliges and gives him the icy bottle as the "Demented One" quickly snatches it from his old frail hands. The senior employees looks at his disrespect and shakes his head before returning to his duty. Dave opens up the water and chugs half of it's contents in under five seconds. Demento lets out a disgusting burb before reclaiming his microphone from the ring mat.

Dave Demento: I see that you guys enjoyed that little "comedic relief", but it's time to get serious. Ever since I first stepped in this very XWA ring, I've been told that I have bitten off more than I can chew. I'll admit it, I came in here and faced off against the former Intercontinental Champion, Drake Dysfunction, and I'll admit it. I was defeated by his god like abilities. But I have something more serious on my hands. This past Sunday, I defeated Stevie Kerpowski. That match gave me five points in this "historic" World Championship match, but most importantly I gained number one contendership for the Rising Star Division Championship. I'm now next in line for a Rising Star Division Championship.

The fans boo at his announcement as Dave flashes a cocky smile their way. Dave points at the screen as the match graphic for Hitman Alex versus Dave Demento flashes to catch the fans attention. Dave once again brings the microphone to his face to speak again.

Dave Demento: All my hard work in that match against Kerpowski obviously meant nothing to the XWA Management. Here tonight, even though I'm covered with my own blood and some thumbtacks, I have to defend my number one contendership against a gay that you all know, Hitman Alex. Apparently, I didn't convince the XWA Management enough for them to give me my title shot, but when I beat Hitman Alex I will choose the stipulation for the match that I will become XWA RSD Champion! When I beat Hitman Alex here tonight, I will prove to everybody that I deserve to face Riley Williamson for MY RSD Championship.

Dave turns back around and faces he entrance screen once again as a clip from Revolutionary Wars plays. The clip in question is that of a backstage brawl between E.G. Deal and Demento himself. Dave stares at the screen before resuming his tirade against his opponents.

Dave Demento: That right there folks is what really pissed me off. This past Sunday, after I won my match, I was brutally attacked by the biggest guy here in the XWA. His name is E.G. Deal. This past Sunday, that lard ass decided to mess with the wrong guy. You see, I might not be the biggest guy, but I have the biggest passion for this industry. That is why I'm going to become the RSD Champion and the XWA World Champion simultaneously. So, E.G. if you want to thug me, go right ahead. But I want you to know something. The XWA is going to be coming live on PPV with Endure. Now, I don't want to force you into doing things you don't want to. But I'm laying down a challenge. At Endure, I want it to be Dave Demento versus E.G. Deal one on one. The best man wins. You've got until next week to give me an answer.

At the end of that sentence, Demento drops the microphone and decides to leave the ring. Dave walks back up the ramp as the thumbtacks stuck deep into his back glisten in the arena lights.

Ted Cedar: Will E.G. Deal accept his challenge?  
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PostSubject: Re: Dave Demento "Lard Ass"   Dave Demento "Lard Ass" EmptyMon Aug 12, 2013 2:56 am

"god like abilities" made me do a double-take. I thought you were sort of all over the place trying to cover all the bases... two matches in one night, plus gripping with management, plus your ongoing spat with EG Deal was a lot to cover. I do have to warn you, though, that EG Deal may not be able to answer your challenge at Endure. I'll do what I can for it to make sense that he takes on you, but if he's in a position to win the tournament your fight might be delayed.
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