1st: Barn Cows (Caleb): 3-0
Last Week: 2nd(+1)
Result: W vs. Siekman06 (132.5-103.0)
Total Points: 347.0(3rd)
Current Streak: W3
-Stop me if you’ve heard this before; Barn Cows were trailing Siekman heading into their final game of the week. Luckily, the Bears' defense(22.0) came out strong from the get-go to build a league and overtake the former #1, without needing any 4th quarter heroics. Outside of TE Vance McDonald(1.5), it was a pretty consistent performance. QB Patrick Mahomes(26.0) led the way with the WR duo of Amari Cooper(23.0) and Julio Jones(22.0) very close in pursuit. The third receiver occupying the FLEX, Terry McLaurin, chipped in 16.0 of his own to help the team. Through three games, The Barn Cows have yet to lose a game and rank third overall in scoring output. They look to extend to a 4-0 record over a disgusting cesspool of a “team” this following week.
Next Week: vs. Clown Town Bliggas (-31.0)
2nd: Cairo Camels (Abdel): 3-0
Last Week: 3rd(+1)
Result: W vs. Huh’s Red Redskins (97.0-68.5)
Total Points: 305.0(7th)
Current Streak: W3
-Three week’s in, and Cairo Camels still find themselves undefeated after a comfortable victory over Huh’s Red Redskins. Cairo Camels will have to move forward without Saquon Barkley(5.0) who exited early with an ankle injury. He likely would have done better with a full game from Saquon, and Kai Fairbairn had an abysmal kicking day with only(1.0). QB Dak Prescott led the way with 21.0 points, while Nelson Agholor(19.0) benefitted from a lack of receiving core in Philadelphia. Green Bay’s defense(14.0) also made life difficult for Denver, and Brandin Cooks(15.0) played fantastically for the Rams. Cairo Camels have their work cut out for them this upcoming week, as they look to defend their undefeated record against the highest scoring team in the league.
Next Week: @ PLB Penguins (+22.5)
3rd: PLB Penguins (CB): 2-1
Last Week: 4th(+1)
Result: W vs. Flex Donovan’s Deal (125.0-102.0)
Total Points: 361.5(1st)
Current Streak: W1
-The PLB Penguins got back on the right track after a week 2 heartbreaker, defeating Flex Donovan’s Deal comfortably despite a great effort from the team. Despite having a loss on the season, PLB Penguins are still the highest scoring team in the league. The RB duo of Alvin Kamara(31.5) and LeSean McCoy(20.5) helped ensure they would occupy the top spot. QB Josh Allen(17.0) also contributed, as well as a solid performance from T.Y. Hilton(16.0). A single point effort from Cairo Santos, who was only allowed to kick once, was not enough to sink this ship. PLB Penguins get one of only two unbeaten teams this following outing.
Next Week: vs. Cairo Camels (-23.5)
4th: MexiHawks (Mexi): 2-1
Last Week: 5th(+1)
Result: W vs. Ferngully (124.0-82.5)
Total Points: 349.5(2nd)
Current Streak: W2
-After a tough break in their season opener, MexiHawks have gone on a year these last two weeks, averaging 123.5 points in both wins, and owning the title of biggest blowout(+41.5). Seattle’s defense(2.0) did not do their fair share of work this week, but everybody else did. 6 of the 9 starters posted a point total of at least 13.5. Leading the way was WR Ty Lockett(26.5), who had an outstanding 11-catch, 154 yard, 1 TD game. Following close behind were QB Lamar Jackson(20.0), and TE Darren Waller(19.5), who had a crazy 13-reception, 134-yard day. MexiHawks are absolutely rolling right now. They’ll be challenged this upcoming week against a team coming off a tight victory.
Next Week: vs. Louisville Losers (-9.5)
5th: Siekman06’s Team (Greg): 2-1
Last Week: 1st(-4)
Result: L vs. Barn Cows (103.0-132.5)
Total Points: 321.0(4th)
Current Streak: L1
-Siekman came into the week ranked first, and despite having a good showing, Barn Cows simply outmatched the team with week. Siekman has to deal with a few guys coming back down to earth in this one; TE Mark Andrews(2.5) ended his recent tear, Kenny Golladay(2.0) had only 17 yards, and Kirk Cousins(11.0) has been underwhelming for a QB. It wasn’t all bad, though. Keenan Allen(36.5) roasted Houston for a 13-reception, 183 yard, 2 TD game. Marlon Mack chipped in 15.0 points of his own, and Carolina’s defense(14.0) tortured Kyler Murray with eight sacks. It’s not nice losing your first game of the season, but Siekman has a juicy match-up awaiting to get back on track.
Next Week: vs. Merlin Olsen Twins (-36.0)
6th: The Romie Remission (TJ): 2-1
Last Week: 13th(+7)
Result: W vs. Ball Fondlers (149.5-114.0)
Total Points: 310.5(6th)
Current Streak: W2
-A lot can change in a week. Sometimes, you find yourself second-to-last in the league points scored, to the by-far highest point total in a single game this season, moving up 9 spots. The Romie Remission soared up the rankings following a massive output for them in their victory over Ball Fondlers. The most impressive part is that they did this with a second consecutive goose-egg from TE Jimmy Graham. But when you have six team members score at least 15 points, that offsets a bit. Dalvin Cook(22.0) continued running all over teams, Sterling Shepherd(23.5) lit up Tampa Bay, and Russell Wilson(41.0) won the week with an astounding 450+ total yard, 4-TD day. We can’t expect this scoring output every week, but The Romie Remission looks to have a lot of confidence moving forward, and against a team who has yet to capture a victory on the season.
Next Week: vs. Leo’s Legendary Team (-2.5)
7th: Attitude City Ninjas (Snoopz): 2-1
Last Week: 9th(+2)
Result: W vs. Moose Nuggets (87.0-78.5)
Total Points: 279.0(11th)
Current Streak: W1
-It was not a particularly wonderful day in Attitude City, but the Ninjas did what they needed to do in order to pull out a victory over Moose Nuggets. Oddly enough, there weren’t any horrible performances(QB Baker Mayfield still should have done better than 9 points), but there was only one good performance as well. Adam Thielen’s early touchdown led to an 18.5 point day. Outside of him, only the RB tandem of Leonard Fournette(11.0) and Derrick Henry(10.5) broke the double-digit barrier. It feels nice to have your lowest scorer still get 6.5, but the rest of your team needs to step up more than this for consistent wins. Next week poses a challenge for the Attitude City Ninjas, against a stout team who has a 1-2 record but has posted decent point totals each week.
Next Week: @ Ball Fondlers (-9.5)
8th: Louisville Losers (Rellim): 2-1
Last Week: 10th(+2)
Result: W vs. Clown Town Bliggas (98.5-94.5)
Total Points: 277.0(12th)
Current Streak: W1
-A step in the right direction! Louisville Losers have had two good victories with a wretched loss in the middle of them. This week was tight against Clown Town Bliggas but in the end, they held on for the win. This was a wildly inconsistent showing. Three starters had 5.0 or fewer points(looking at that 1.5, Kyle Rudolph), three others had 6.5-10 points, and the top three scorers posted 19.0-25.5 points. RB Christian McCaffrey(25.5) paced the team due to a 76-yard TD run, QB Carson Wentz(21.0) performed respectably, and Marvin Jones Jr.(19.0) had a bit of a surprisingly stellar game. Life won’t get any easier next week as Louisville Losers will need an all-around consistent showing in a match-up against a team scoring a lot of points this season.
Next Week: @ MexiHawks (+9.5)
9th: Ball Fondlers (JHalc):1-2
Last Week: 7th(-2)
Result: L vs. The Romie Remission (114.0-149.5)
Total Points: 319.0(5th)
Current Streak: L1
-Ball Fondlers drew the short straw this week. They would have beaten 11 of the other teams in the league, but got graced with the highest scorer of the week. The team played well, but could not keep up with The Romie Remission who were out of their minds. Speaking of playing out of their minds, Mike Evans(41.0) finally remembered he is one of the best WRs in the world, and put together a performance with 190 yards and three TDs. TE Greg Olsen(22.0) also continued his hot streak, while Jared Goff and New England’s defense both chipped in 13.0. Unfortunately, the rest of the starting line up couldn’t eclipse the 5.5 mark, leaving 28.5 potential points on the bench. Luckily, Melvin Gordon shouldn’t be far from a return. Ball Fondlers will likely have to make due without him for at least one more week in their upcoming battle.
Next Week: @ Attitude City Ninjas (+9.5)
10th: Flex Donovan’s Deal (Ian): 1-2
Last Week: 8th(-2)
Result: L vs. PLB Penguins (102.0-125.0)
Total Points: 300.5(8th)
Current Streak: L2
-While a better performance this week, Flex Donovan’s Deal still could not flex with a second consecutive loss, this time at the hands of PLB Penguins. TE Jared Cook had a healthy 7-yard catch for a grand total of half a point, and JJ Arcega-Whiteside(1.5) couldn’t make the most out of half of his offense being down and out. Mark Ingram(33.0) scored three times and QB DeShaun Watson(25.0) threw three himself, but their performances were not enough to overcome a majority of the team doing below average. Next week could be a good chance at righting the ship against another team with only a 1-2 record, fighting to break .500.
Next Week: vs. Moose Nuggets (-1.0)
11th: Moose Nuggets (Moose): 1-2
Last Week: 6th(-5)
Result: L vs. Attitude City Ninjas (78.5-87.0)
Total Points: 295.5(9th)
Current Streak: L1
-Remember last week, when Moose Nuggets were fourth in scoring and coming off a massive blowout victory? Yeah…. All good things must come to an end. QB Phillip Rivers(18.0) led the team with a couple touchdown passes while Nick Chubb played well enough to rack up 14.0. Overall though, it was a disappointing showing. TE George Kittle(8.0) didn’t play poorly, but has yet to show the magic he possessed last year. Chris Godwin only 5.5, which is a far cry from what he has been doing this season, and Will Lutz(2.0) missed a PAT. With the third lowest score of the week, perhaps this team’s week 2 blowout was a mirage. Can they prove me wrong over a team in a similar position this coming week?
Next Week: @ Flex Donovan’s Deal (+1.0)
12th: Clown Town Bliggas (Burdur): 1-2
Last Week: 11th(-1)
Result: L vs. Louisville Losers (94.5-98.5)
Total Points: 268.0(13th)
Current Streak: L2
-Clown Town Bliggas we’re still in the game heading into Monday, but watched their lead slip away and took a loss to Louisville Losers. TE Austin Hooper(21.0) decided to have a career game, and QB Derek Carr(15.0) could have been worse. Sadly, the RB duo disappointed. Josh Jacobs(4.0) has taken quite a backseat after an outstanding debut, and Le’Veon Bell(7.0) has struggled at being the Jets’ entire offense. There were points left on the bench that could have helped the Bliggas out, but they were in the bench. So they lost. The rapist formerly known as Antonio Brown has been cut from the team, A.J. Green’s return is far out, and Le’Veon Bell gets the week off. All this as they go into a week 4 division showdown over the league’s current #1 team.
Next Week: @ Barn Cows (+31.0)
13th: Merlin Olsen Twins (Saintpat): 1-2
Last Week: 15th(+2)
Result: W vs. Leo’s Legendary Team (89.5-71.0)
Total Points: 256.5(14th)
Current Streak: W1
-They did it! The returning champions have now officially won a game! Merlin Olsen Twins took out Leo’s Legends in a battle of “first victory.” It wasn’t the prettiest of wins, but they accomplished what they needed. Cooper Kupp(27.5) continued his stellar start with an 11 catch, 102 yard, 2 TD showing. A 76-yard TD between QB Mason Rudolph(13.0) and Juju Smith-Schuster(15.5) was arguably the deciding factor for this victory, as the rest of the team did not carry their weight…. like, at all. A win is always nice, but they’ll need to kick it into a new gear to get a streak going, against one of the top scorers in the league.
Next Week: @ Siekman (+36.0)
14th: Huh’s Red Redskins (Huh): 1-2
Last Week: 12th(-2)
Result: L vs. Cairo Camels (68.5-97.0)
Total Points: 241.5(15th)
Current Streak: L1
-It’s hard to get a good feel for this team so far. A convincing win last week was sandwiched between being the lowest scorer in the league the other two weeks. This time Huh’s Red Redskins were blown out by Cairo Camels. The talent is here, but the execution… not so much. Two very talented WRs busted BIG TIME with Calvin Ridley and Stefon Diggs putting up 3.0 points. Combined. Yikes. QB Mitchell Trubisky(19.0) finally had a good game, and Ezekiel Elliott(14.0) still managed 139 scrimmage yards. But there is nothing else to talk about how this team’s week went. It was mediocre at best. They are in a beautiful bounce-back spot this week against the worst team in the league.
Next Week: @ Ferngully (+1.5)
15th: Leo’s Legendary Team (Leo): 0-3
Last Week: 14th(-1)
Result: L vs. Merlin Olsen Twins (71.0-89.5)
Total Points: 285.0(10th)
Current Streak: L3
-What a step in the wrong direction. Leo’s Legendary Team has yet to win a game, but was at least performing admirably in their first two weeks. This week they lost yet again, but completely fell apart and allowed another winless team to add their first victory. Tom Brady. He did well. Got 20.0 points for the team. Phillip Lindsay(26.0) did wonderful with two rushing TDs. Too bad he was left on the bench and his scoring output didn’t matter, when it would have resulted in a victory. Outside of Buffalo’s defense(12.0), there is nothing else to discuss. The team had a very bad week and playoff hopes are slowly dwindling with each passing week. He will be going up against the team with the highest scoring output of week 3 in his upcoming contest.
Next Week: @ The Romie Remission (+2.5)
16th: Ferngully6 (Alex): 0-3
Last Week: 16th
Result: L vs. MexiHawks (82.5-124.0)
Total Points: 221.0(16th)
Current Streak: L3
-Ferngully was bound for improvement after hitting rock bottom last week. Unfortunately, improvement wasn’t enough as Ferngully suffered the biggest blowout of the week at the hands of MexiHawks. They have a scoring margin of -50 PPG. Congrats to Evan Engram(20.0) and Julian Edelman(15.5) for at least trying. The rest of you; get better. Looking at you, QB Joe Flacco(4.0). If there was ever a time to get a win, it would be next week.
Next Week: vs. Huh’s Red Redskins (-1.5)
DIVISION STANDINGS
EAST:
1. Barn Cows: 3-0, 1-0(1st)
2. PLB Penguins: 2-1, 0-1(5th)
3. Louisville Losers: 2-1, 1-0(8th)
4. Clown Town Bliggas: 1-2, 0-2(12th)
NORTH:
1. Attitude City Ninjas: 2-1, 1-0(4th)
2. Siekman: 2-1, 0-0(6th)
3. The Romie Remission: 2-1, 1-1(7th)
4. Flex Donovan’s Deal: 1-2, 0-1(10th)
SOUTH:
1. Cairo Camels: 3-0, 1-0(2nd)
2. Ball Fondlers: 1-2, 1-0(9th)
3. Huh’s Red Redskins: 1-2, 0-1(14th)
4. Ferngully6: 0-3, 0-1(16th)
WEST:
1. MexiHawks: 2-1, 1-0(3rd)
2. Moose Nuggets: 1-2, 0-0(11th)
3. Merlin Olsen Twins: 1-2, 1-0(13th)
4. Leo’s Legendary Team: 0-3, 0-2(15th)
Subject: XWA 2019 Fantasy Football Power Rankings: WEEK 3 
