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 S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"

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Myke
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S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" Empty
PostSubject: S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"   S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" EmptySat Sep 05, 2015 10:05 pm



Due: September 15th, 2015

One Post By: Shade & Samael
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Myke
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S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" Empty
PostSubject: Re: S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"   S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" EmptySun Sep 06, 2015 7:36 pm

Following a short advertisement for the King of Xtreme Pay-Per-View Event, the scene opens up to Shade and Samael chilling in a room, presumably their own locker room. Shade is standing up with his back turned to the camera and Samael is sitting down on a chair, with a small table with a laptop on it in front of him. Those watching carefully can see that the LionHeart Championship is on the ground in front of Shade. Suddenly, between Shade's legs, a liquid is seen streaming down. Samael's expression of shock says it all.

Samael: "Are you... PISSING... on the LionHeart Championship?"

Shade: "Well I gotta piss somewhere."

Samael: "Use a toilet then!"

A zipping noise follows and Shade grabs a towel off a rack nearby. He reaches down to grab the belt with one hand as he wipes off the belt with the towel with his other hand.

Shade: "I consider this a toilet. Also, sorry you had to see that everyone. I'm supposed to be interviewed but apparently the guy is late. Lovely."

Shade finishes wiping the belt and throws the towel to the side. A knock on the door can be heard.

Samael: "Come in."

Behind the camera's view, someone enters. They walk forward and enter the scene. They're a male, appearing to be in their late twenties or early thirties. He has never been seen before in XWA until today. Looks like he's just a generic interviewer who will never share his name.

Shade: "Alright. Let's get this over with, shall we?"

Interviewer: "So Shade, how do you feel about coming off such a controversial win?"

Right off the bat, Shade is visibly annoyed.

Shade: "What are you talking about?"

Interviewer: "Message boards are exploding about the ending to your Street Fight Match against Greg Samuel. In particular, there are three users leaving comments to one another in our own message boards on the XWA website. Two of them, by the names of 'Gay4Batman' and 'Double-D-Rocks' are ganging up on someone by the name of 'Little Egyptian' saying that Street Fight Matches aren't supposed to end outside of the ring. The Egyptian user says they're wrong and it's stemming into this whole debate."

Shade: "There was nothing controversial about my win. See, what people fail to realize is that Street Fights can end in the ring or outside of it. When I was randomly thrown into the match against Greg, we were told it was a Street Fight. That's it. They didn't bother going into details. What exactly IS a Street Fight Match? We just dress in street clothes? It's a version of a No-Disqualification Match?"

Interviewer: "That's exactly what 'Double-D Rocks' believes."

Shade: "He's wrong. Plain and simple."

Interviewer: "And 'Gay4Batman' says that, and I quote: 'common knowledge what a Street Fight is.'"

Shade: "This is... okay. Samael, bring the laptop over here please."

Samael does just that and Shade grabs it, balancing it on one hand and typing with the other.

Shade: "See here, XWA lists stipulations on the website. Including what these 'common knowledge' matches are. It lists: Singles Matches, Hardcore Matches, No-Disqualification Matches, Tables Matches, Fans Bring the Weapons Matches, etc.. etc.. etc.. Now if those are 'common knowledge' why are they listed on there? Now let me do a quick control-F search for 'Street Fight' ... And what do you know? It's not listed on there! So there is absolutely no definition of a Street Fight Match on our website. That's a shame. So how about on other websites? Let me take a look."

Shade rapidly types some more.

Shade: "Okay, so. There's this great site called Wikipedia. Let me quote it, shall I? Because here's the kicker: there are MULTIPLE definitions. Here's the first one I found: 'A Street Fight uses the various elements of 'No Holds Barred' and 'No-Disqualification' and occasionally does allow pinfalls and submissions outside of the ring.' Well look at that! 'Occasionally'. How about another? 'A match that does not observe disqualifications, where pinfalls must take place in the ring, can also be known as an Unsanctioned Match or Street Fight.' Well that's not helpful! How about a third?! Oh here's one for a Chicago Street Fight: 'A Chicago Street Fight Match is based around the brutal fights once held in Chicago, Illinois. There are no disqualifications and falls count anywhere.' Oh wow. Look at that. Multiple definitions! And management never told myself or Greg what variation we would be doing. And I've seen both versions of a Street Fight! So I guess it's not common knowledge. And that 'Gay4Batman' is wrong and he knows Batman isn't a real superhero, right?"

Interviewer: "I... uh..."

Shade: "Let me guess: first day on the job?"

Shade hands the laptop back over to Samael.

Shade: "I'll make this easy for you then. My win for this belt wasn't controversial. Instead, it was a curse. Why? THE LIONHEART CHAMPIONSHIP SUCKS! I just wasn't about to let Greg beat me in my first fucking match back. Why I was given a random championship match to begin with is beyond me, but hey... whatever. Gives me another accolade under my belt, I guess. With that said: now is where you ask me about my opponent tonight."

Interviewer: "How are you plan-"

Shade (Interrupting): "I'M PLANNING ON DESTROYING DANTE, PLAIN AND SIMPLE. See, I got so pissed off about this fucking championship, that I had a little talk with our General Manager. I said to him: 'If I am forced to defend my championship in every match, and my first match is against Dante, then how about BOTH championships are on the line? It's only fair!' and he listened! And the BEAUTIFUL thing is that when I beat Dante... he doesn't have a rematch clause!"

A large amount of cheering can be heard in the background, appearing as if people want Shade to end Dante's championship reign.

Shade: "Yeah, they have the right idea. Dante hasn't defended his championship since winning it back. This is literally what has happened: the belt was vacated... himself and Icon fought for it... he won. He defended against Icon. He fought Bruce Benjamin down the line and lost. But he had a rematch clause since he defended it successfully. So he used it and won it back. Since then, it's been gathering dust. So when I beat him for it... he cannot go 'I WANT A REMATCH! HUR-DUR-HUR-DUR!' Nope! He doesn't get one! And that is just fucking beautiful. That's the whole reason why I said I wanted the belt, to be honest. I might fucking vacate it next week! Or maybe this belt! Which brings me to my next point!"

Shade turns around dramatically, just to face the camera again.

Shade: "WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THE KOX WINNER ISN'T THE LIONHEART CHAMPION? AND WHAT IF I TOLD YOU THE WORLD CHAMPION DOESN'T BECOME THE LIONHEART CHAMPION?"

Shade adjusts himself.

Shade: "A lot of people think that whether I win or lose, that the KoX winner is going to be the LionHeart Champion. Well there's TWO more Vendettas before King of Xtreme. One of those will include the semi-finals. But the other week won't. It's possible that in a non-qualifier, the LionHeart Championship switches hands. OH MY GOD. IT'S COMPLETELY UNHEARD OF. And then, people think that even if the KoX winner is the LionHeart Champion that OBVIOUSLY they're going to go undefeated all the way until XtremeMania. It's possible they will. But it's also possible that the belt will switch hands. Everyone needs to calm their fucking tits. Maybe I'll carry both belts with me and go for the World Championship and carry three belts. Then I'll troll the company and fucking vacate everything. My god. Internet fanboys are the fucking worst."

The interviewer stands there perplexed.

Shade: "You can leave now."

Samael: "Might want to do that before he gets angry."

As he starts to leave, Shade picks up the towel from before.

Shade: "Here, catch!"

Shade tosses the towel and interviewer catches it.

Shade: "Looks like you can use it from all that sweat you've built up."

The interviewer smiles and begins wiping his face with the towel as he leaves, ending the scene with Shade smirking that the interviewer just wiped a piss-covered towel over his face.
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Gopher
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S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" Empty
PostSubject: Re: S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"   S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" EmptySun Sep 06, 2015 7:48 pm

This promo makes me sad. Sad for all the time and effort put in by great men to build the fourth walls that have been absolutely obliterated today.

It was entertaining, though.
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https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsmVNcqWmf-E73tdf3cUCVg
Caine
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S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" Empty
PostSubject: Re: S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"   S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" EmptyMon Sep 07, 2015 12:42 am

Angry anxious paranoia, with logic and reasoning. Good stuff mate, this was great. Wunderbar!

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Storey
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PostSubject: Re: S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"   S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" EmptyMon Sep 07, 2015 6:45 am

You wanna go, Myke?
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Batman
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S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" Empty
PostSubject: Re: S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"   S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" EmptyMon Sep 07, 2015 6:52 am

'Double-D-Rocks'

I'm pretty sure this one's me.

Great promo though. walk
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Myke
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S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" Empty
PostSubject: Re: S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"   S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" EmptyMon Sep 07, 2015 7:35 am

Storey wrote:
You wanna go, Myke?

S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" Lets+go+m8+ill+bite+ur+face+of+i+swer+_07c224b794a9d627d680517890d48bd7
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PostSubject: Re: S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT"   S7) Shade & Samael - "FUCK THIS FUCKING BELT" Empty

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