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PostSubject: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptySun Jul 28, 2013 9:59 am


Wrestling Jokes

**I did not come up with ANY of these jokes, some I don’t find funny myself because of their sickness and immorality, but it’s just for entertainment purposes only, enjoy**

- BREAKING NEWS: Rob Van Dam has signed a contract with WWE. Let’s hope he doesn’t hang around with Swagger too much..

Q: If Kofi Kingston and The Dynamite Kid were a tag team what were their name be?
A: BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE

Q: Why does Vince want to go to heaven?
A: Because he has no chance in hell

Q: Why did Kevin Nash cross the road?
A: He didn’t, he already tore his quad stepping off the curb

Q: Why does Big Show lose his way so frequently?
A: He keeps turning.

How many members of the IWC does it take to put up a lightbulb. A hundred. One to screw it in. The other 99 to complain about how it’s not like the lightbulbs from the Attitude Era.

”Accidentally ran over a kid wearing a John Cena T-shirt. In my defense, I couldn’t see him.”

What did John Cena tell the Japanese Chef?
-You can’t Sashimi!

What did D’Von tell Bubba when they were working at McDonalds?
-Oh Bubba, test the fries!

Why was Ultimate Warrior fired from the pet shop?
-He couldn’t sell Pedigree

What did Hulk Hogan ask in Arts and Crafts class?
-Whatcha you gonna glue, brother?

Why can’t Chris Benoit go to the gas station?
-Because he always carries matches (and he’s dead)

The Dudley’s were getting ready for a dinner party when Bubba realized that they weren’t prepared yet. Quickly, he yelled, Dvon! Set the table!

Matt hardy so fat he sat on the rainbow and skittles fell out.

Q: What did John Cena say to his teacher when she give him an average report card?
A: “You can’t C me!”

What did CM Punk tell Adam Copeland when he tried to feel him up?
I’m straight, Edge.

Q: RVD and Jeff Hardy get into a car. Who’s driving?
A: The Police.

Q: Why does Mick Foley buy supermarket brand cola?
A: He always goes for the cheap pop

Q: What do you call David Otunga without the talent?
A: David Otunga

Q: What did Batista say when he was hit with a basketball?
A: BASKETBALLS DON”T HOLD GRUDGES!!!

Q: What do you get when you go to Sean Waltman’s house during summer?
A: X-Pac heat

Q: Why did Rikishi become a Chinese food chef?
A: He did it for the wok

Q: What was the name of Chris Jericho’s sex book?
A: ARMBAR…guide to 1004 sex positions!

Q: What does Eddie Guerrero say when he misses his wife?
A: Where the F**K was VICKIE!!!

Q: What did Zack Ryder say when he was taught by a radio?
A: Ahhh RADIO tell me everything you know!!!

Q: What does Owen Hart say everytime he goes to McDonalds?
A: I AM NOT A MCNUGGET!!!!!

Q: What does Shawn Michaels look for in a woman?
A: Someone with screwjob lips.

Q: Why couldn’t Hulk Hogan sleep in the 80′s?
A: He could never lie down for more than three seconds.

Q: Want to hear a Wrestling joke?
A: David Otunga

Q: What does Jerry “The King” Lawler say everytime he goes to a funeral?
A: “That’s it he’s dead”

Q: Why can’t John Cena buy moves from Ultimate Warrior?
A: Because he doesn’t sell them

Q: What is Dolph Ziggler’s favorite song?
A: “Who are you”-by The Who

Q: Who would make the best teacher on Adjectives & verbs?
A: Kevin Nash

Q: What did a fan say when he saw Batista at a seafood restaurant?
A: Batista likes FISHSTICKS!!!

Q: How does Randy Orton grade your test if you failed?
A: STUPID! STUPID! STUPID!

C.M. Punk walks into a bar… Razz

Why does Vince McMahon walk funny?
- Why do you think Triple H has had so many title reigns?

What’s the difference between Vladimir Kozlov and Heidenreich?
- Vladimir Kozlov didn’t …. Michael Cole

What’s the difference between Chris Benoit and Scott Steiner?
- I wouldn’t let Scott Steiner look after my son.

Why did Kevin Nash cross the road?
- He didn’t, he already tore his quad stepping off the curb.

How many TNA fans does it take to put up a lightbulb?
- Both of them.

Why dosen’t TNA have any lightbulbs?
- Ric Flair ordered a pizza, got angry that it took 20 minutes to arrive so he cut a promo on the delivery guy busting himself open with one of lightbulbs and then proceeded on giving elbow drops and dropping knees to rest of the them eventually taking a bumb on the shattered glass while everybody says “he still got it”

Why does Cena do five-knuckle shuffle?
- He’s counting the number of moves he got.

When Dolph Ziggler introduced himself to Vince McMahon, who did Vince introduce Dolph to?
- The nearest shovel

Q: Why did Shaemus Break up with his last girlfriend?
A: Cause she told too many lies, too many lies!

What does Brooke Hogan say when you blow in her ear?
A: Ooooooo…….thanks for the refill.

Q: What’s the difference between a wrestling career and herpes?
A: A wrestling career doesn’t last forever.

Q: What do you call John Cena fans?
A: Right *evil laugh*

Q: What does Awesome Kong have between her breasts that Gail Kim doesn’t?
A: A belly button!

Q: How does Kevin Steen sort his laundry?
A: Filthy goes here, filthy-but wearable goes there.

Q: What do John Cena and Ric Flair have in common?
A: They Both have the same slogan, “You can’t see me “. Cena from the ring, Flair when it’s time to pay his bar tab!

Q: How many WWE fans does it take to put up a light bulb?
A: Nne, they don’t need 1, they all have to be in bed by 7pm.

Q: What’s Sheamus’ favorite song?
A: Come on Feel the White Noise

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Got a new one? Drop a comment below Smile
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptySun Jul 28, 2013 10:15 am

I Iol'd at quite a few of those.

Oh, Cena.
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptySun Jul 28, 2013 10:51 am

Some of these were funny lol
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptySun Jul 28, 2013 3:28 pm

I found a lot of them stupid, but there were some good ones too.

"Why did Kevin Nash cross the road?
- He didn’t, he already tore his quad stepping off the curb.

How many TNA fans does it take to put up a lightbulb?
- Both of them.

What did CM Punk tell Adam Copeland when he tried to feel him up?
I’m straight, Edge. "

Those were pretty good. Funny
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptySun Jul 28, 2013 5:53 pm

I giggled on some of them, some of the others were really dumb like all of the Otunga ones. Because Otunga is great.
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptySun Jul 28, 2013 5:56 pm

What’s the difference between Chris Benoit and Scott Steiner?
- I wouldn’t let Scott Steiner look after my son.


ROFL! 
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptySun Jul 28, 2013 7:41 pm

"What's David Otunga minus the talent?
-David Otunga"

ROFL!

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Favorite Current Wrestlers:
1. Seth Rollins
2. AJ Styles
3. Kevin Owens
4. Shinsuke Nakamura
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Favorite All-Time Wrestlers:
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2. CM Punk
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptySun Jul 28, 2013 10:46 pm

I thought I made a good joke when Orton won MiTB and I said the divorce papers were in the case..
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptyMon Jul 29, 2013 12:05 am

Q: RVD and Jeff Hardy get into a car. Who’s driving?
A: The Police.

This one was alright. Funny


The best ones were the ones listed in the posts above. Most are either corny or just entirely unfunny, but those few were pretty funny.

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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptyMon Jul 29, 2013 12:11 am

^ Yeah that Jeff Hardy/RVD one was funny.
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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptyMon Jul 29, 2013 12:37 am

Glassjaw wrote:
I thought I made a good joke when Orton won MiTB and I said the divorce papers were in the case..
Booo

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PostSubject: Re: Wrestling Jokes   Wrestling Jokes EmptyMon Jul 29, 2013 1:32 am

Glassjaw wrote:
I thought I made a good joke when Orton won MiTB and I said the divorce papers were in the case..

Might explain Cena winning last year.
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