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Giggity Gopher
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Join date : 2013-07-19
Age : 27
Location : Arlington, Texas

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PostSubject: Vendetta #94 Grades   Vendetta #94 Grades EmptySun Oct 19, 2014 9:23 am

MATCH // SINGLES
Justin Savior vs. Jake Evanston
Grader: None

Double no-show.

MATCH // SINGLES
Jared Jerusalem vs. Joey Jobberton
Grader: None

Jobber match.

MATCH // KING OF XTREME SEMI-FINALS - BARBED WIRE MASSACRE
Xtreme Icon vs. Akira Kobayashi
Grader: Meth

Akira: First, I love your pacing in this match. You tease and tease with the barbed wire and but don’t dive head first into it, instead saving it for later. This is a definite positive, it adds a sense of dread and importance to the match as well as being a good writing technique to keep us readers interested. The history geek in me wasn’t a fan of your “wielding the cane in both hands like a broadsword” simile mainly because broadswords are nigh-on impossible to grasp effectively in two hands, but props for the imagery (not going to mark you down for that, it’s just a peeve of mine). I was a great fan of how you wrote Akira actively trying to avoid the hardcore aspects of the barbed wire massacre for the most part, knowing full well that Icon would be the favourite if it came down to a weapon swinging competition and had Akira try and turn it into a wrestling match. One little thing; try and reference the wrestlers in more varied ways. In one paragraph you use “Akira” thirteen times. The little references to different parts of the match throughout the latter parts of your post make me giddy as I adore that sort of writing. It doesn’t have to be anything major, but acknowledging the past parts of the match is a sign of good writing. There are times where I felt some moves could be described better, but overall the description isn’t bad. Your strength lies in your ability to write selling, each move is sold perfectly and the reactions are spot on. Lots of people go overboard and make moves seem ludicrously powerful or they pretend everyone sells like Ziggler or the Rock, but you manage to keep it realistic. The match ending was, well, violent. Like I legit felt a bit bad for Icon. You fuck.

Icon: Honestly wasn’t expecting the match to start off where you started it, so props for catching me off guard. Firstly, your pacing isn’t brilliant. The match reads at an incredibly fast pace which makes it feel rushed. There’s no slowing down, no build up, it’s like Sonic the Hedgehog did a line of speed and wrote this. Gotta go fast. The description isn’t really there. Try to describe your moves a bit more, the same with selling. A lot of the moves seemed lacklustre as the selling wasn’t really there. Moves were hit, but they did nothing, most of the time the victim didn’t react, or was up ready for the next move almost instantly. Again, the finish seemed really rushed. Life gets in the way, it happens to us all so it was good of you to get something up instead of giving Akira a no-show victory like many would have (hell, I’ve done it to Akira a couple of times now, I should probably make it up at some point). Nothing else much to say, it wasn’t your best but you knew that when you posted. Wish you had more time, was looking forward to a strong post from you.

Verdict: Akira. Icon didn’t have the time to work on his match that well this week and it cost him. Not much else to be said.


MATCH // SINGLES
Kendrick Bayne vs. Razor Xtreme
Grader: None

This match was a storyline match.

MATCH // HANDICAP MATCH
Nicholas Carson & Kasabian Stalker vs. Dolly
Grader: None

Jobber match.

MATCH // SINGLES
E.G. Deal vs. Cletus The Lumberjack
Grader: None

Both men technically posted, but Abdel's post was clearly not a serious effort. So, Cletus wins. If he wants feedback, he can PM Vlad.

MATCH // KING OF XTREME SEMI-FINALS - BARBED WIRE MASSACRE - LIONHEART CHAMPIONSHIP
Hitman Alex vs. Vladimir Strife
Grader: Snoopz

Vladimir Strife: Great descriptive ability. I liked how you took your time with getting into the barbed wire. You built up to it nicely instead of "BOOM, BARBED WIRE MOTHERFUCKER". When you did get into the hardcore action, you really got going with some good and innovative stuff. The Samoan Drop, the Death Note, hell, you even made a Drop Toe Hold beautiful. One thing I could suggest is using signatures moves' real names. For instance, I didn't actually know what the Death Note was just based on your description. I had to look it up. Once I found out what it was, your description made perfect sense, but I couldn't think of it before then. I also didn't like that you not only had Vlad kick out of Alex's finisher, but his finisher through a barbed wire table. I don't feel like this match was quite a big enough one to warrant that. It's big, but not big enough to warrant a kickout after a finisher through a barbed wire table. I didn't like Alex kicking out after your finisher either, although I loved the way it was done. Barbed wire fist straight to the face. Beautiful. The fact that you had both men kick out of finishers instead of just Vlad made it a little better, though. The ending was as brutal as the rest of the match. All in all, this was a very good post. I was most impressed with the innovative stuff you were able to come up with and just how brutal it was.

Hitman Alex: I don't know why you had the crowd cheering for both men. Alex is a face and Vlad is a heel. Even in his post, Vlad had the audience 100% behind Alex. Your descriptions were decent at best. I would read work by people like Rob or Mick (even though he's currently on hiatus) and try to pick up what they do for their descriptions. Also, branch out what you call the wrestlers more. It was "Alex does this. Vlad does that. Alex does this. Vlad does that." It gets very repetitive and disrupts the flow. Mix it up between first and last names, add nicknames, etc. You don't need to go crazy there, but just mix it up a bit. As far as your action goes, it was good. You had some interesting stuff, such as the attempted dive by Vlad that was dodged and caused him to go into a board of barbed wire. You also had each other's finishers get used and not end the match. Like I told Vlad, I don't like that, but it isn't as bad when both men do their finishers. At least you made it even, like he did. I also quite liked your ending. The slow pull into the pin after landing the move was great. Made it seem like both men just went through a war. This was a good post. I must say, I'm pleasantly surprised. You've improved greatly since the last time I read one of your matches. You still got some work to do, but you're getting much better.

Verdict: I'm sorry this wasn't a better grading. It's 1 AM and I'm dead tired right now. I'm going to give this one to Vladimir Strife. I just felt he edged it in every way. Both men had great action, but his was just a bit more unique and devastating. Vlad had the superior description, as well. You both had flaws, but Vlad had less. This was a really good match. Good luck in the finals, Vlad.


MATCH // SINGLES
Rob Chapman vs. Mark Storey
Grader: None

Double no-show.
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Giggity Gopher
Love Bites
Love Bites
Giggity Gopher

Posts : 9335
Join date : 2013-07-19
Age : 27
Location : Arlington, Texas

Vendetta #94 Grades Empty
PostSubject: Re: Vendetta #94 Grades   Vendetta #94 Grades EmptyMon Oct 20, 2014 7:59 am

Gradings are out.

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